Here's how the copy for this ad should read

This season why flatter your figure when you can hide it? This cozy fleece pantsuit sends the message that you value comfort over all else and can't be bothered to operate modern day nuisances like buttons and zippers. Who needs 'em?! Perfect for a day filled with watching daytime TV, compulsive eating and periods of uncontrollable crying. If this snazzy ensemble can't make the model look good just imagine how you'll look in it!